SatyrSatire
Est. Ben "Jammin" Franklin  ·  All The News That Fits

Waterproof. Unlike your GPU.

Paid Advertisement — Satyr Satire

Ink That Stays Where You Put It.

Forever Ink is formulated to remain legible under conditions that have historically ended the written record. Rain. Flooding. The kind of spill that destroys a server room. The kind of spill that ends a relationship. Forever Ink does not run, fade, bleed, or reconsider.

We developed Forever Ink after years of observing ink that did not last forever. We considered this unacceptable. We applied chemistry. The result is ink that will remain exactly where it was placed, conveying exactly what was intended, long after the parties involved have moved on.

Pairs with Forever Paper for a writing system that will survive the cloud, the outage, the merger, and the apology tour that follows.

Our Products

Archival Black

$18.00

Carbon-pigment, waterproof, fade-resistant to 200 years. For documents that need to mean something long after the author is available to clarify.

The Correspondent Set

$44.00

Four colours. Black, blue, red, and a deep burgundy we describe as "serious." Used by journalists who print on paper and do not apologize for it.

Industrial Permanent Marker

$9.00

Marks on any surface. Waterproof. Solvent-resistant. Not recommended for skin, though it will wash off eventually. The eventually is longer than expected.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is Forever Ink actually waterproof? Yes. We tested it. Not on purpose initially, but the results were consistent across conditions.

Can it be used on AI chips? We do not recommend applying any liquid to AI chips, including ink, water, or sports drinks. See recent coverage in Satyr Satire for context.

What is the shelf life? The ink, stored properly, lasts 25 years unopened. Once opened, it should be used with a sense of purpose. Ink left open without purpose dries out. This is a metaphor we did not intend but stand behind.

Forever Ink is a wholly fictional product appearing in Satyr Satire, a satire publication. No actual ink is for sale. Satyr Satire is not responsible for any documents that outlast their authors, institutions, or the circumstances under which they were written. The industrial marker warning about skin is genuine advice and should be heeded.